= Bride =Both
= Groom = Worksheet

Duties of the attendants 

Maid or matron of honor
Chief attendant...assists you with all tasks: reminding bridesmaids of fitting dates, making sure they all have their dresses on time, helping address invitations, helping the bride to dress, carrying the rings, holding bouquet during ceremony, arranging train for recessional, keeping your nerves steady, etc.

These ladies provide support and friendship on your wedding day, and lend a helping hand with details before the wedding; helping address invitations, making "bird seed bags", etc.

Flower girl
The flower girl immediately precedes the bride strewing flower petals in her path. These may be real or silk petals, depending upon church rules and your own preference (remember real petals can stain when walked on).

Best man
Aide-de-camp...helps the groom dress, carries the ring and marriage license, pays the clergyman with check from the groom, gives the first toast, supervises the ushers...making sure they are in place on time, general assistant to the groom. As with the maid of honor, it is rare but permissible to name two best men.

These gentlemen provide support and friendship on your wedding day, and lend a helping hand with details before the wedding. Groomsmen most often serve as ushers on your wedding day, lighting candles and seating guests. Every groomsman/usher is expected to know the directions to the reception area, and will direct guests when needed.

Ring bearer
The ring bearer carries a pillow with rings tied to it. These rings are usually symbolic instead of the actual rings...depends on age and reliability of ring bearer. If actual rings are used, be sure they are secure but easy to remove. The maid of honor may remove the groom's ring and give it to the officiant and the best man may remove the bride's ring.

Greet and escort guests to their seats, light candles, and seat family members. When guests arrive, the usher should ask whether they are a friend of the bride or groom and seat them accordingly...bride's side is the right side (facing the back of the church) and groom's side is the left side (facing the back of the church). Bride and groom may elect to dispense with this tradition and seat guests at random. The usher will offer his arm to the lady and, her escort, if any, will follow. Gentlemen are not ushered but directed to the proper place. If two or three women arrive together, he should offer his arm to the oldest or nearest (whichever is least awkward) and ask the others to follow.

Grandmothers are ushered in just before the mothers. The groom's grandmother/s is seated first, brides's grandmother/s, groom's mother and finally bride's mother. The bride's mother is seated on the first pew on the bride's side...if there is no "privacy wall" in front of the first pew, the first pew is not used unless seating space is critical. The groom's mother is seated likewise on the opposite side. Grandmothers are seated directly behind the mothers. Additional seats may be reserved for close family and friends. In very large churches with no center aisle, mothers are seated on opposite ends of the center section seats. No one is seated after the mother of the bride is seated, but may be quietly directed to seats in the rear or side.

Immediately after the recessional, the parents of the bride are escorted to the rear of the church. The usher offers his arm to the mother, and the father follows. The parents of the groom are then escorted out, and finally the grandparents. The officiant will then dismiss the congregation and/or direct them to the reception area.

Hostesses can be seated together in reserved pews and dressed alike if the bride chooses; otherwise they dress appropriately for a wedding and make themselves known to the director, so she can direct them to their positions for the reception. Corsages are provided for the servers to distinguish them as special friends. Hostesses/servers usually in pairs serve the wedding cake, the groom's cake, punch, and keep the guest book. They should not be expected to serve during the entire wedding but to have time to mingle and be a guest themselves ...assigning more than one person to each task with specific times is helpful, otherwise ask them to serve for the first 30 minutes and then leave positions unattended.

Wedding party  <<  Previous chapter  Next chapter  >>  Wedding party attire  

Worksheets available (click on the blue arrow to the right of the file to download it below)
 AttendB.xls = Bride's attendants
 AttendG.xls = Groom's attendants

Edna S,
Aug 20, 2013, 2:39 PM
Edna S,
Aug 20, 2013, 2:39 PM